Time to express my thoughts in hopes to help others

My life changed on the 10th of March, 2010. I worked in a high needs room much too long and today I live in pain. I wish I was stronger back then or more mature to understand what my role was doing to my body. Two weeks before the injury I asked for help and was told to slow down. Impossible when you have seven severely disabled students to take care of.
I loved where I worked and was on excellent terms with admin and staff. Then everything changed.  Those early days when I was injured and couldn't walk more the 5 metres, no one from the school bothered to contact me to see how I was doing. I was shocked as I thought I got along with staff there.
I didn't file a work cover claim until the last day I could and boy was I glad I did because never....NEVER did i think that I'd be living with chronic pain 3 years and 4 months later.
My background was dance, my passion is the arts and now I don't know if dance will ever be able to be a part of my life. I know I will never teach for the Department of Education again or step foot in the school I taught at. I felt as though I was thrown out like trash after my contract expired. I'll never forget that meeting when they let me go. They crushed my heart.
I'm a positive person and I have never had to work so hard on being positive. I hate that they took part of that from me however I will work on getting better but it sure will take a long time before I get there.

Things that have helped me:
1. My GP is an amazing. incredible doctor who understands what I'm going through. He has been there to support me from day 1.
2. My psych- she specalises in Chronic pain and helps provide me with amazing verbal guidance.
3. Husband/friends- I do have to learn to do it on my own however there are days when I'm so down and they help pick me up.
4. Pain Specialists- they truly understand what I'm going through. They are here to help me and give me the support and literature I need to get stronger and manage my pain.
5. Melbourne Storm- you might ask how an NRL team has helped me but they sure have! Storm was the first passion I found since being injured. It took me a good 2 years to find another love but I did. I have a special bond with the Storm. They make me happy and it's great to feel a part of something even if it is short lived.

Today I feel like I'm drowning. It's not been a good day. I tried completing a Tai Chi class for the first time last night which has really aggravated my back. I tried though which is the important thing. Back to hydro and light gym routines.

I have a lot to learn and a long way to go. Depression is the hardest thing to deal with because even when I'm happy I often still feel a great sadness overwhelming me. I don't want it to beat me and I won't let it.

My journey and road ahead is long. I have to learn who this new person is because I'm not the same person I was before my injury took place.

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

We need better campaigns when educating others about chronic pain

Image
When someone says disability what jumps to your mind? You may picture someone in a wheelchair, motorised cart, overweight , older?  Who knows however I imagine it could be along this line. Many adds we see these days use these types of people , so I don't blame people for jumping to these conclusions. I strongly feel a newer campaign needs to be started. I'd love to be the face of pain. Why.....well I'm youngish and whilst just glancing at me you can't always see my disability. Society needs a much more effective advertisement of  people living with invisible diseases. It can be impossible to know when looking at people, when they're young, in good shape and smiling. I've been in pain for so long now it's just become a part of my life. It definitely doesn't make things easy however I'm not going to walk around disheveled, in torn clothes, shoeless with a dark cloud over my head shouting "I'm in pain......ohhhhhhhh I'm in pain everyo...
Read more

Dance has Returned to my Life Although This Time with Chronic Pain

Image
Something pretty amazing happened on December 15 th , 2016. Dance returned to my life.  It was absent for close to 7 years due to a workplace injury  (non-dance related job) on March 17 th , 2010. My body went through trauma at the time of the injury which had left me with neuropathic pain. I remember thinking on the Thursday it took place that I’d be back at work on the Monday. Little did I know that almost 7 years later I’d still be living with chronic pain. When my injury took place I wasn’t able to walk more than 10 metres due to the severity of the pain. I went two years without knowing what was wrong with me. Two years after my injury I met my chronic pain specialist who has been a gem in my life. Both he and my GP are outstanding and have guided and supported my decisions. When I first met my Chronic Pain specialist he explained to me what was going on in my body, he also told me that I wouldn’t be able to dance again to which I broke down as dance was my every...
Read more

Pacing

Pacing.....anyone with chronic pain will probably be sick of hearing it ,however it's one of the most important words when you have chronic pain. I've pulled back heaps since I got injured, and you know what I reckon I need to pull back even more. Having a routine is so important. Making sure you find the right balance of resting and moving about is crucial. For me a typical day looks like this: Wake up, put dishes away, take my meds, feed dogs , make my breakfast and rest. Normally starting to flare at this point so I turn on my heat blanket and chill. Next I get showered, dressed, put my make up on, this causes a flare up so rest time it is. Off to work I go.  I work part time hours. Work can be tricky however the mental stimulation and interaction is important. I have a mat at work where I stretch if I need to. Often I'll do reduced hours, get to work and not be able to finish however other times I do my best at pushing through. Listening to my body is t...
Read more