Time to express my thoughts in hopes to help others

My life changed on the 10th of March, 2010. I worked in a high needs room much too long and today I live in pain. I wish I was stronger back then or more mature to understand what my role was doing to my body. Two weeks before the injury I asked for help and was told to slow down. Impossible when you have seven severely disabled students to take care of.
I loved where I worked and was on excellent terms with admin and staff. Then everything changed.  Those early days when I was injured and couldn't walk more the 5 metres, no one from the school bothered to contact me to see how I was doing. I was shocked as I thought I got along with staff there.
I didn't file a work cover claim until the last day I could and boy was I glad I did because never....NEVER did i think that I'd be living with chronic pain 3 years and 4 months later.
My background was dance, my passion is the arts and now I don't know if dance will ever be able to be a part of my life. I know I will never teach for the Department of Education again or step foot in the school I taught at. I felt as though I was thrown out like trash after my contract expired. I'll never forget that meeting when they let me go. They crushed my heart.
I'm a positive person and I have never had to work so hard on being positive. I hate that they took part of that from me however I will work on getting better but it sure will take a long time before I get there.

Things that have helped me:
1. My GP is an amazing. incredible doctor who understands what I'm going through. He has been there to support me from day 1.
2. My psych- she specalises in Chronic pain and helps provide me with amazing verbal guidance.
3. Husband/friends- I do have to learn to do it on my own however there are days when I'm so down and they help pick me up.
4. Pain Specialists- they truly understand what I'm going through. They are here to help me and give me the support and literature I need to get stronger and manage my pain.
5. Melbourne Storm- you might ask how an NRL team has helped me but they sure have! Storm was the first passion I found since being injured. It took me a good 2 years to find another love but I did. I have a special bond with the Storm. They make me happy and it's great to feel a part of something even if it is short lived.

Today I feel like I'm drowning. It's not been a good day. I tried completing a Tai Chi class for the first time last night which has really aggravated my back. I tried though which is the important thing. Back to hydro and light gym routines.

I have a lot to learn and a long way to go. Depression is the hardest thing to deal with because even when I'm happy I often still feel a great sadness overwhelming me. I don't want it to beat me and I won't let it.

My journey and road ahead is long. I have to learn who this new person is because I'm not the same person I was before my injury took place.

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